A Fresh Batch of Claireisms

It's been a while. I need to document all the funnies.  And the pictures.

So here goes...

Claire loves playing in the rain.  OK, here are some really not that great pictures I took of her after it rained, as she played in the puddles:  (This was back when I put the SLR on "AUTO."  NO MORE, my friends.  I at least can put it in program mode and shoot pictures that way.  It's semi-automatic :)

 Always wanting me to take her picture, as you can see? :) PS, I can't believe she is wearing shoes!!  (Like, not barefoot!)

 This is what she did when I told her to open her eyes and LOOK AT ME!!

OK and here are some better pictures Jordan took of Claire playing outside after a rainfall...

 Like the matching shoes Jordan put her in?  Yeah, those were a hand-me-down. We're not rich enough to buy shoes that don't go with like every outfit :)

 Like her dirty face??

And on a sunny day!!

 LOVE my baby's profile.  I hope it stays this cute!!! (like, it doesn't turn into MY profile, lol)

 HAM HAM HAM!

 I just LOVE this picture.  SO cute.

 Man, this posing thing really gets me worn out!

Lip Gloss.  She loves it.  She adores it.  I hope she doesn't worship it..... :)

A sugar-aholic!

Gross.

Claire's love-affair with the goat at a friends' house.  She was OBSESSED with it.  NO problem hugging it every second she could.

I sure with Claire would pose so perfectly like the blonde little cutie behind her :)

So, some fun pictures.  Here are some funny Claireisms:

*So, Claire was playing with the neighbor boy, Mason (who is nearly four), and he was doing the "potty dance."  So, he was told to go in and go to the bathroom, but he resisted.  Claire then told him, "Mason, you'd better go in and go potty.  One....two....." Counting, just like Mommy does.  Ha!!

*The other day, after playing with my sister's cat, Claire said "Mom I want a cat at our house."  OF course, I would NEVER EVER want that, but I asked her, "Well, what would you name it?" She thought for a second and then said, "JC Penney."  CRAZY. I think she's been to that store...twice??  (Sorry Bec...we prefer Kohl's).

*Claire doesn't like wearing shoes.  At least during the summer.  She takes them off every chance she gets.  It drives me nuts when she takes them off in the car while running errands.  So, not only do I have to take two kids out of carseats, get a cart, etc. but I have to put her shoes back on too!!  So, a couple of weeks ago, Claire hops into the car to go to church.  We were in such a hurry, we didn't realize she had NO shoes on.  So, we got to church.  She was barefooted.  We live like 2 minutes away, but when Jordan said he'd go home to get them, I said, "Why bother?  She takes them off in nursery anyway."  And she did.

*Every time Jordan leaves for work, Claire needs lots of "goodnight" kisses. (In fact, if she doesn't get them, she has been known to FREAK OUT.  Jordan turned the car around the other day--he was super close though...we're not that nice!)  This has moved onto other people.  She will say that he needs a goodnight kiss before a lot of people leave the house. It's pretty funny...

*Every night, Claire wants me to tell her a "Princess Story."  In fact, in her vocabulary, when you pluralize "princess," it is "princessesses."  It has to have Princess Claire, the "Mean Witch" (I think that comes from a Dora episode), and then she'll tell me all the other people that need to be in it, including her friends, "the lake" (wherever that came from?), mermaids, fairies, etc.  Then, I have the fun job of coming up with a plot.  Fortunately, a plot for a 2 yr. old's entertainment goes something like this:

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess named...Claire. (she generally fills in her name)
She lived in a pink castle with hearts and "sparkelies" all over it.  
One day, the mean witch came and turned the castle into a black castle with green and brown spiders on it!
So, Princess Claire went to Daddy, who told her to see the "Magical Wizard" so that he could make a potion that would turn it pink again.
She went to the wizard.
He made a potion.
The fairies sprinkled it onto the castle.
It changed back.
They lived happily ever after.
The End.

OK, so it has a bit more detail... and sometimes I do make the story educational.  Like, in order to make the potion, she must remember to:

Not sit on Baby Sister
Share
Be nice
Say please and thank you
Ask a question, don't demand.

Etc. etc.

Maybe it'll work one day.

*Claire is now actually really fully potty trained...well, with very minimal accidents.  She even sleeps in panties! Woot woot!!

*Speaking of potty training. Some of you may think this is a bit T.M.I, but you know me....  SO, when we were trying to get Claire to go poop on the potty, she would sometimes ask me to push down on her thighs, while she "pushed out the poopies."  So, she'd say, "Mom, push on my legs!"  I would do ANYTHING to get her to actually go numero dos, so I did exactly that.  Eventually it worked and she started leaving all her bowel movements in the toilet instead of her panties.  Awesome.

Anyway, a little while ago, I sat down to go potty myself.  Yes, I go potty in front of her.  It's all part of being a mom and teaching your kids that they must go on the potty like you!  But, I digress...  So, I'm on the potty, and Claire comes up to me and says, "Mom, do you need to go poop??? I will push on your legs!!"  She starts to push on my legs and makes some fun pushing noises for me.  It was hysterical.  I love it.  She still does it...  I let her.

*She's kinda been starting to twirl and suck on her hair.  NOT awesome.

Anyway, she's cute!!  And dangerous to a baby! Keep them away.  Today, she picked Anya up by the neck. Dragged her by the arms across the concrete. And sat on her.  And laid on her.  And kicked her in the face.  It's very surprising Anya is still alive, actually. Pheww!!

Crazy Claire.

She is nuts.  Cute nuts.

Want to hear some things she's been saying lately?  They are pretty hilarious.

*  So, my friend, Natalie is in the car with Claire (waiting for me, surprise surprise) and Claire all of the sudden, looks over at a neighbor man or worker in the neighborhood and said:  "That's a handsome dude!"

*Also in Natalie's car, since I had gone back into the house so much for items I'd missed (again, surprise surprise)...Natalie taught her to say this to me when I returned:  "Mama, you're driving me NUTS!"  She enjoys saying it all the time now!  Awesome.

*  "Mama I hear the ambulance!  It takes the people to the doctors office because they're sick so they will feel better!"

*After going to the zoo and seeing the pathetic camel there, Auntie Jessica taught her a little about camels.  This is what she recites now every time we ask her where they live:  "Camels live in the hot desert."  How many humps they have:  "They have 2 humps."  And what their humps are for:  "Their humps are for storing water and drinking water."

*One day, Claire was playing with Jordan and started pulling out his leg hairs.  When he protested, she said, "Don't worry Daddy, you have more!"

*The other night, we were saying prayers and she repeated after me (Now, I don't know about your kids, but she kinda doesn't like to say prayers these days because it's the signal for "after this, you really do have to sleep" so generally now she doesn't repeat after me because she's protesting...but this time she did) when I said, "Please bless me to be happy."  But she said, "Please bless me to be grumpy!"  I couldn't help but laugh, which made her repeat everything I "blessed" from there on out with some sort of grumpy reference.  The little turkey.

*Claire is a funny sleeper.  She wakes up ALL THE TIME because she's been having pretty bad growing pains, or she will just wake up halfway due to a bad dream (about monkeys, elephants, princesses, bugs, flowers, etc.).  Anyway, so Jordan came home from work late the other night and went to kiss Claire "goodnight" while she was asleep.  Well, she woke up halfway, and I guess Jordan's hand was close to her face, and she took it and said softly, "Dada."  And he said, "Yes, sweetheart?"  "Your hands smell really yucky."
*The other day, Claire had been crying (over who knows what, since she's two!) and she got a dish towel and said matter-of-factly, wiping her eyes :  "Mama, I'm wiping my raindrops."

*Yesterday, Claire yelled over to me: "Look at me, Mama! I'm adorable!"  Pretty cute.  And would think she was full of herself, except she has no clue what "adorable" means actually.  I asked.

*So, we've been potty training, and Claire HAS TO have her purse full of all of her panties with her EVERYWHERE she goes.  She is obsessed.  More on this later in the potty-training saga post I will be doing soon.  Anyway, today, she was putting some panties in her purse panties in the purse, and said to them:  "Seriously, panties?  You need to go in there."

*So, she also has this awful habit of distracting Anya while she's nursing.  Today was no exception.  Claire is bugging Anya again, and so I threaten to go upstairs with Anya for some quiet nursing time, and have Claire stay downstairs watching Dora.  Claire says, "No Mama, I not fight with you anymore. I love you! Don't go upstairs!"  It was too cute.  I stayed.  And she didn't bug us.

And now for some interesting photos...

 *Claire is also obsessed (I know, I have a future OCD'er on my hands...don't remind me) with band-aids.  There are no "owies" underneath them.  But now they are all put up and she knows she only gets one if there's blood :)

 Yep, to the pool too.  And she freaks out when they start coming off.  Needless to say, I didn't need to put hardly any sunscreen on the left leg.

And yes, on her nose.  This one, though, was really painful to remove bc it was a "real" band-aid...the fabric good and stuck kind.  She cried, and had this red welt on her face for a few hours.  Again, no owie, but the band-aid actually ended up creating one!

It was bound to happen sooner or later...

Couple days ago, I was just done putting Anya to bed upstairs, and I hear a very excited little voice yell up the stairs: "Mommy! I use scissors and cut my hair all by myself!" "Mommy I cut my hair with scissors!"

Yep, that bad.

So "Auntie Natalie" came to the rescue about 20 minutes later (she lives up the street) and fixed it :)

Claire really enjoys looking DOWN while getting her hair cut. Btw. this is her first "official" hair cut...by a professional :)

And here it is! So cute! One side is a bit shorter, but we didn't want the whole bob to be too short, so we'll just wait til it grows a bit and even it out. (This is at the Bountiful Temple....whole other story....was up there waiting for my sis to get home and stopped by. Claire LOVED the "princess" brides walking around. We crashed a couple of weddings. They were probably wondering why I was wearing jeans...)

Now, every time I ask Claire "Who can cut your hair with scissors?" She says, "Auntie Nattie or Mommy." That's right. Or maybe Daddy or Grandma can too, but let's keep it simple.

Easter Dress

SO, now that I have my new sewing machine, I've been going crazy with sewing projects! I love it!! And I'm getting way better at sewing...to the point that I've finally made some apparel-items I wouldn't mind anyone wearing in public.

Drumroll:

Ta da!!!!!!!!


And there she is showing it off with her signature Chuckie smile!

Now, I have to say that I TOOK these pictures with Jordan's fancy camera. So, basically there were a LOT of out focus pictures. Mainly because I have no idea how to use his camera, and then I had issues taking pictures of a squirmy 2-yr old (go figure, right?)









So I actually made TWO super cute coordinating Easter dresses. But Anya's was off the second church got out, so I only got pictures of Claire. But I'm obsessed with how adorable they turned out, actually. To the point that I even forced...ok...helped...some of my friends make them for their girls for Easter too :) I want to show off and say they were soooo hard, but they're not, let's be honest here :)This is me we're talking about!







Oh, funny about when I was pinning the pattern pieces to the fabric... Claire comes up and says "I do ouchies" and she started jabbing pins into the pattern pieces haha. She was calling the pins "ouchies" because we always say "oh, don't touch those, they're ouchie!" LOL.

More Claireisms

Claire is saying so many cute, funny things, it's getting overwhelming to blog them all, I must say.

Sad thing is, when she's with cousins or friends, all people really see are her "terrible two" moments...

So I have to document her cute moments to make sure they exist haha. But there are some "terrible" ones too, let's be honest.


Love this pic of the girls. Claire loves laying on the floor next to Anya.

And this one! "Baby Sister and Claire!" as Claire says :)

Claire enjoys makeup. Every once in a while I put one swipe of mascara on each set of her lashes. I think it makes her look a little like Cindi Lou Who :)

This is Claire's favorite thing about Costco. Besides the hot dogs. No wait, maybe that's my favorite :)


Claire was putting the moves on Connor at her friend, Ella's birthday party. He wasn't having it lol!

And speaking of that birthday party: I am kind of obsessed with the cake Kjirsten made. I even watched the video about how to make it on marthastewart.com. I am so impressed, Kjirsten!! That is why I make cupcakes. They are WAY easier to decorate :)

Other funny Claireisms (minus the pictures I guess!)

-We've been teaching Claire to--instead of let out an annoying whine--say "no thank you" when she doesn't want the food we're trying to get her to eat. So far so good. But the other night, she REALLY didn't want the food. She said, "DUDE! No thank you, DUDE!"

-What's Claire's favorite food? Butterfly food. I don't know why, but that's always what she says.

-The other day, Claire really wanted Jordan to paint her nails (he's done it a couple of times...) His excuse was that he was sick (Jordan is always sick :( ). So she said, "Please Daddy! I have medicine!"

-Recent FHE lesson was on saying your sorry. Claire should know this one since she goes into time out 57 times a day, and always says "sorry baby sister" and gives hugs after... ANYWAY, we related the story of Nephi building the boat and how his brothers wouldn't help and then they repented and told him they were sorry. Jordan then held up the picture that corresponded to the story. There was Nephi in front of a boat with a pile of building supplies next to him, and the brothers, etc. etc. Anyway, Jordan said, "Claire, what is Nephi building?" She said, "He's building a boat!" And then Jordan sked, "Claire, what's he building it out of?" And she said, just as resolutely: "He's building it out of CRAP!" Jordan says she said that because the pile of building supplies beside Nephi looked a lot like the "crap" (computer stuff, circuits, etc.) I tell him to pick up in the living room. Ooops! :)

-OK, this may be a little TMI, but she's 2 so.... I have to tell anyway. So, lots of mornings when Claire wakes up, I look at her, and she can tell I'm kinda trying to look up her nose to see if she has these enormous "crusty boogies" I may need to extract (which is her NOT favorite thing) before we are seen in public. It's funny because when she sees me looking she'll cover her nose, haha. Anyway, so the other day I was changing her diaper, and was giving a closer look to her little bum crack because I thought it has "residue" in it. Gross I know. (btw. there wasn't--it was just diaper rash cream) So, Claire looks at me sternly and says, "Mommy, there's no crusty boogies in my bum!!"

-Claire likes to feed everyone but herself really... She likes to say, "Here comes the train" and put it in your mouth. Tonight she didn't like the spinach in her soup. So, she offers me her spoon with the spinach on it, saying "Here comes the leafy train!" Then, she graduated to "Eat the leaf, giraffe!" That went a little too far. I am not a giraffe.

-Claire can count in Spanish and loves to climb (singing "sube!" from Diego) and then yell out "Ayudame!! Help!" til we come get her. Auntie Natalie especially loves this Claireism :) She likes to call her "Natty Bones" too.

-When Jordan drives the car fast, or does a quick turn, Claire says "CRAZY driver!"

-Claire has adopted the phrase, "You're killin' me" into her vocabulary. I wonder where she got that from? What mother would say that to her 2-yr. old??

-The naughtiest and most all-over-the-place Claire has ever been during family night has been during the "Obedience" lesson. Go fig. We definitely remembered which lesson we were on the next Monday, when usually we forget.

-Today Claire saw that I had an "owie" on my finger, and she said, "I'm worried about you, Mommy." And I said "Why?" She continued: "Your owie. I'm worried about you, Mommy."

-Claire is obsessed with bullying (pushing, headlocking, WWF...whatever you want to call it) younger boys. I hope this doesn't last into her teens...

-One playgroup when Claire was in timeout for pushing this sweet defenseless little boy, Cooper, another little boy (she also does the same thing to), Hudson, came over to her during her stint in the naughty corner, and she yelled at him: "Go away! I in time out!!" Haha :)

-She just started thinking potty language is hilarious. The other day she spilled some food (can't remember what it was) on her shirt. She was picking it off with her fingers, all the while saying "
mmmm, poop! Mmmm poop!" She's crazy.

-She loves telling us that her name is "Claire Michelle Taylor" especially when we call her by other pet names--she corrects us defiantly. And "Anya Corinne Taylor" is baby sister's name. She also LOVES calling Jordan by his first name, or "Honey" and saying "Jordan Dewey Taylor" or just "Daddy Dewey Taylor" or what sounds like "Dewey Dewey Taylor." She loves the "Dewey" part. It's her great grandpa's name so that's good! She doesn't ever remember my name though.

-When she wants to be held, she says, "Cara me! Cara me!" Jordan corrects her. I don't. I don't like to correct the cute ways she says things...it's depressing because I want her to stay young and adorable for as long as possible!

I just love my little sweetie bug. I love tucking her into bed and singing her songs. I love it when she says "I love you so much" and "Snuggle me, Mommy" and "Thank you mommy!" I love it when she says "It's OK sweetie bug" to Anya or "baby sister, bless you!" when she sneezes. And I love it when she screams, "Daddy's home!" nearly hyperventilating with joy, when Jordan walks through the door. She is my little monkey.

I take that back...

...referring to the previous post.

Claire went down for a nap while playing with Anya's binkies (that she and Claire have never cared about) and I go to check on her, and that is what I found. I was dying.

All Made Up

Caught Claire on camera (camera phone...yeah, not the best pics) yesterday making herself "pretty, mommy!!"

Except, with crayons...

I think it's funny that she has the reds in her left hand, and is applying purple and blue to her face. She's into the "winter" look, that's for sure.

And well here is what happens when she actually uses real makeup (the mascara mommy was dumb enough to leave around Grandma and Grandpa Taylor's house, in this case):

And then, just had to post this. No reason, just had to.

Well, Anya is kinda smiling, and Claire is smiling goofy, but isn't even doing her usual "Chucky" smile!

Speaking of Chucky. I've been meaning to post the incredible resemblance...

Especially with her wounded face...
She used to "smile" like this all the time and is just recently beginning to realize that it is not attractive :)